I'm gonna ask my doc about an amnio to do a mature lung test before he does the c-section. And the only reason I'll ask about that is becaise he wasn't to deliver her at 38w5d. I know by then their lungs are NORMALLY developed enough, but w/ GD they sometimes have a harder time and need to be on a vent. So I want to make sure he dosen't take her too soon, ya know.
I'm just gonna accept this and move on. And do my best to watch what I eat. This will be hard though.
What about my puddin pops?!?!?!
Sodas, and cake?
Who want's veggies and sugar free jello?
O'well not too much longer I guess I'll survive.
Here's a pic I just now took it this morning.
82 comments:
Hey Rachel,
We are praying for you and baby Hannah. I am sorry to hear about your GD. Out of all my pregnancies I was never diagnosed with GD but I understand that you would be worried about your little sweet :) Eating no sweets would be so hard, I will pray that you don't get too many cravings for all your favourites!
You have such a perfect belly! I miss being pregnant when I see belly's like yours!
Hope you are feeling well :)
Much Love Carly x
You look fantastic Rachel. Just like you said, this is going by quickly - stick to the good foods and you'll be back to your pudding pops in no time!
I have no words. I'm so, so sorry. I'm praying.
Hi,
I follow Kayleigh's story and heard about your family. I want you to know that my family will be praying for yours! Our hearts ache for you.
May the Lord bring you exactly what you need in this very difficult time.
love in Him,
Heather and family
Praying...
Hi Rachel,
I also have been follow Kayleigh's story and heard about you and your family. You are all in our prayers during this difficult time.
My prayers are with you
Caryn
Another memeber of Kayleigh's prayer circle
Rachel & Ryan,
I am also a follower of Kayleigh's story and Ferris Joye's Ambient Light blog. I found your story a couple of months ago and I just want to tell you that my heart goes out to you both in these most difficult moments of your lives. I lift you up to the Lord and pray that he gives the peace and strength you need to endure this season of life.
God Bless,
Nichole
"Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor and comfort me once again." -Psalm 71:20-21
I am a member on Cafemom and heard the news on the december expecting group.
I am so so sorry.
I know there is nothing i can say that will help but i want you to know you and your family are in my prayers
Dear Rachel and Ryan,
I am so broken for you tonight. My family and friends are praying for you.
May God give you His peace and may you find Hope through this darkness. Know that you are not alone.
With our deepest sympathy and prayers across the Ocean.
Love Carly, Sam, Scarlett, River and Angel Christian.
Words cannot express the sorrow I feel for your family. May God continue to cradle you in His loving arms.
I cam to you through carly and kayleigh's blog, please know that I am praying for you. May you find peace and may God heal you in this hard time!
Dear Rachel,
Carly from Australia and I are friends through blog world. She shared your heartache and asked for us to pray. First, I am so very sorry for your loss! I am sorry...I know no words would ever fill the sadness in your heart. I do pray that God's love and peace would surround you and that you would allow yourself to be comforted by Him...praying in CO.
Praying for you.
(one of Kayleighs warriors)
God please let Rachel and Ryan find peace in Your spirit. guide them through this unbelievably challenging time. hold them and Hannah in Your arms. please hold them close.
Dear Rachel and family, I found you also through Carly, and I'm so very sorry for the loss of your sweet girl. I'll be praying for you all as well. Lighting a candle too.
Warmly, Mel
Came here through Carly's blog as well. Just wanted to send hugs and prayers from Ga. I'll be lighting a candle for you.
Carly sent me. I'm so sorry. It is just not fair.
I will be lighting a candle tonight for both your precious girls.
Praying for you both.
I came to know your story through Kayleigh's blog. May God be with you during this time. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
I am so sorry for you all. I have been reading Hannah story since about june, waiting for all your good news. Kayleigh's daddy told me about your loss and I had to offer my thoughts of healing and peace to you.
I am truely thinking about you and your chldren, and sending all the comforting peaceful thoughts I can to you.
I hope you soon are able to make a full physical recovery so that you can beging to process internally.
-T
Just sending up prayers. I found your story through Kayleigh's plog as well. So many people praying for you. We have traveled this road. My daughter has lost two little boys back to back. Just sending hugs/prayers. I pray you search out support and find peace in God's arms.
Rachel and Ryan, my heart aches for you. I have come upon your blog through Kayleigh and a couple others. Words cannot express how I feel for your loss. Keep looking to God. I know it doesn't seem fair right now, but God IS with you and LOVES YOU. Feel the warmth of HIS arms as HE wraps you with HIS love. I'm praying for a full recovery for Rachel.
In Christ's Love,
Amy S from KS
I also followed Kayleigh's dad's post with the link to your page and wanted to let you know how very sorry I am for the loss of your daughter, your family will be in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time - May you find comfort in the fact that you have total strangers praying for you - and wishing nothing but health for you now as your recover from your c-section and health in your future.... God bless
Dear Ryan and Rachel,
I have been following Kayleigh's story and am just so sorry to hear about the loss of baby Hannah...there are no words. I will pray, though, that the Heaven's will shine down on you, that your beautiful angels will watch over you, and that in time you will feel happiness in your hearts once again.
My deepest sympathy,
Laura
Rachel, May God carry your family through this rough time in your life and bless you with healing fast and making the scar tissue dissapear so that you will be able to carry another baby with out any complications. God has a plan and please know that he will make everything ok
God bless, Brandi Ortiz in Ohio, Adam Freemans cousin
You don't know who I am, but I'm also a follower of Kayleighs story, and just wanted you to know that there are so many people praying for you and your family, myself included. I am so sorry for your loss.
I'm so sorry for your your loss. I know there isn't any thing in the world that can be said to make the pain to go a way. You are in our prayers for everything that you and your family has gone through.
Rachel and Ryan,
I am in your December group on Cafe mom and I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am. My heart is breaking for both of you. I hope you find the strength to get through this together. I really have no words I am so sad for both of you. Please let me know if I can do anything for either of you.
My deepest sympathy
Tammy
I too am a reader of Kayleigh's and am so sorry for losses and will pray for strengh and courage for your family.
I am a member from Cafemom's December group.
I am so so sorry.
I know there is nothing i can say that will help but i want you to know you and your family are in my prayers.
I am on the Dec 2008 Cafemom group with you and also follow Kaleigh's blog. I am so sorry for the loss you have experienced and you and your babies are constantly in my thoughts.
I am one of your fellow moms on cafemom in our December group and heard the news. I am so sorry for your loss. I was praying for a great update about the post you left. I know there are no words I can say to make you and your husband feel better but I want you to know I will be praying for you guys.
Rachel and Ryan, I am so, so, so sorry for your loss. It seems like only yesterday that I cried for Carly and now for her sweet baby sister Hannah. It's not fair, you've been through so much. Find comfort that your beautiful baby girls have each other. They will forever be able to run and dance in heaven.
Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
-Lorna
Hi Rachel,
I heard about what happened on Kayleigh's blog. I am so sorry. Your story breaks my heart. I know we talked a little by email several months ago as we were both in the middle of complicated pregnancies. I'll be praying for you tonight. It is so hard to understand why God allows some people to face such terrible things, but lean on him through this time.
With prayer...
Sara
I wanted to let you know that you are in my families thoughts. I'm so sorry for your loss. If there is anything I can do, please let me know. I'm on Cafemom, I go by Orchid404.
I'm visiting you from Kayleigh's blog. I don't have anything comforting to say, no words of wisdom. I just wanted to tell you that many tears are being shed over your loss of baby Hannah.
I will be praying for your quick recovery and for strength for you and Ryan.
Rachel & Ryan,
Y'all are in our thoughts and prayers. I can't imagine what you are going through right now. Your little girls are watching over the both of you from heaven, saving y'all a spot right next to them.
God Bless,
Heather, Joseph, & Bailey Alyse Woollard
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I pray for you and hope everything goes well. I wish the best for you. I follow Kayleighs story.
I am so sorry to hear your loss of your sweet baby Hannah. I just Pray that you can find peace and comfort during this time. I have faith that God does have a plan for you...
Lots of love
-a preemie mom
Rachel and Ryan, I am so desperately sorry for the tragic loss of your beautiful daughter. Carly directed me to your blog and I had been reading it for a while. I have no meaningful words only prayers to offer up for you.
Much love
Sarah xx
I also found out about you through Kayleigh's blog. I am so sorry that you are going through this right now and I just want you to know that I'm praying for you.
I don't think there are any words that I could say to make you feel better, so I just hope that God can give you the comfort and peace that you need.
Rachel, I am praying for you and your husband. UNC has one of the best hospitals around. They'll take excellent care of you.
Rachel & Ryan,
I am so very sorry for your loss. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. May God give you peace and comfort during these difficult times.
Lisa C.
Hebron, KY
(Kayleigh blog follower)
I said a prayer for you and your family this morning. You will be in my daily prayers along with Kayleigh and her family. I cannot imagine the devastation you are experiencing. May God lay his hands on you to heal and give you the strength you need in the extremely difficult time.
Jennifer
Rachel and Ryan,
I came upon your story through Kayleigh's. I am praying for you both. May He hold you in the palm of His hand, catch every tear you shed, and carry you through these moments.
In prayer,
Hillary
mom to Emily, Alie and angel Natalie
We are praying for you and your family!
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. May god be with you and your family in these times of needs. I am praying for you and your family. God Bless..
From Arkansas
rachel
i love you so much. please call me if you need to talk. im so sorry rachel i just heard the news. I cant stop crying
i love you
suzy
Rach, it's me, Sarah...
babe, i'm SO SO SORRYYY...
i just cannot believe what i read as i was checking on Kayleigh.
i'm balling my eyes out. for you, for Ryan, your family.
I'm praying that you recover.
I broke the news to the ladies on STD, and they're in utter shock.
i love you. and i'm allllways here for you. dno't you ever forget that.
-Sarah Shano
Rachel and Ryan- another Kayleigh follower :-D I am deeply grieved to hear of your loss. You are in our prayers! I wish there was something I could say that would actually help. I feel very guilty right now because I'm 34 weeks pregnant with a healthy little girl and all i can do is complain about my back ache and how hard it is to be pregnant. My troubles are so pathetic and here you are standing strong in your faith and showing the world what an awesome God we have. I may be young and not know much but I can say that I have already been amazed at how God can take something truly horrible and devastating and somehow someway use it to produce something so beautiful and incredible- I'm excited to see his blessings and his power through your situation. Stay strong! ~Sarah
Rachel and Ryan,
We are so sorry to hear about your precious Hannah. Our hearts are breaking for you. Life certainly doesn't make sense sometimes; we just pray that God will provide the strength you need to see you through these sad times. Hannah is with the Lord and he is wrapping her in His love. Hannah will have the pleasure of being reunited with her two amazing parents someday- try to find solace in knowing that you will hold her again. You are in our hearts and prayers.
With love,
The Renfrow Family
Rachel, I am so sorry for your loss. I was shocked when Adam posted about your recent tragedy. Please accept my entire family's condolences. Remember the footsteps poem? Right now, God is carrying you and your family.
Let me know when you are ready for a Hannah angel baby, my hook and yarn will be waiting.
Michelle Bogart
Rachel & Ryan,
I came upon your story through Kayleigh's website as well. Please know that I have put your family on my prayer list. I am so sorry to read what you have been through. I'm a firm believer in that God has things happen for a reason...we may not realize what that is for many years but someday we will. Please keep faith in God and know that you have many people praying for your family.
God Bless,
Karen
My family is following Kayleigh's story and our attention was brought to you and your girls stories. We just wanted to let you know that we are praying for you and your family during this time...
Benedict family from Northern NY
You are in my prayers...
My heart is aching for you this morning. No words will sufficiently express to you and your husband how deeply sorry I am for your loss. I pray that your faith in our Lord and Savior will get you through this season of sorrow. Rachel, although we have never met, I have followed your story through Kayleigh's blog and I want you to know that as your sister in Christ, I will pray for you. Keep strong in knowing that your two little ones are playing at heaven's playground.
Rhonda Smith
Odenville, AL
Hi, I'm another Kaylie blog Follower from Canada. I just want to say I'm so sorry for you loss, and your family is in my prayers right now! God will get you through this!
Jolene
I'm so sorry my heart hurts for you and Rayn if I can do anything please let me know 704-301-5097 I want to come and see you'll when you feel the time is right take care love you'll (((hugs)))
Cissie
My family will pray for yours during this difficult time.
Another Kayleigh follower.
I am so deeply sorry for your loss. No one should have to go through that pain. I am praying for your healing and for your two angels in Heaven.
My deepest sympathy.
Sara
I am so sorry for your loss. I am praying for you guys! I can not even come close to understand what you guys are going through. Just know that lots of people are thinking and praying for you!
Hey Rachel,
I am so sorry to hear about Hannah. We are praying hard for you. Your courage and strength with Carly blew me away and now you are are doing it again with the most difficult situation I could ever imagine. You are such an amazing, godly woman. Know that many prayer warriors are going to the throne of God on your behalf.
Love...Ferris Joye
Rachel and Ryan,
I am so so sorry for your loss. Nobody should have to go what you have been through. I pray God will see you through this and give you strength. ILY
Cindy
So very sorry to hear that Hannah didn't make it; you must be devastated. There are no words, but I know that Heaven is weeping with you, even as Hannah is finding her place there.
Rachel and Ryan,
I am truly sorry for your loss and the difficult surgery you are going through. I am praying for you for healing both physically and emotionally. Please know that God is there for you to lay your burden on him and take his yoke because it is easy and light.
Praying for you,
The Scotts
Coming to you from New England and Carly's blog. My deepest sympathies and love go to you and Ryan.
I have no words , but my heart is broken for you and I am sending prayers your way. May God send you peace.
Rachel,
I am another person who follows Kayleigh's blog. I am so sorry for your loss. My heart aches for you. I am praying for you and your family.
God Bless
Melissa in Massachusetts
Praying....crying and praying.
Rachel,
The previous post pretty much sums it up for me. Praying, crying and praying. We will also light a candle for your angels and you tonight.
Karen
I closed my eyes
and prayed to God today.
I asked what makes a Mother
and I know I heard Him say,
A Mother has a baby.
This we know is true.
But God can you be a Mother
when your baby's not with you?
"Yes you can!", He replied
with confidence in His voice,
"I give many women babies,
when they leave is not their choice.
"Some I send for a lifetime
and others for a day.
And some I send to feel your womb
but there's no need to stay.
I just don't understand this God,
I want my baby here.
He took a breath and cleared His throat
and then I saw a tear.
I wish I could show you
what your child is doing today.
If you could see your child smile
with other children and say,
"We go to earth to learn our lessons
of love and life and fear.
My Mommy loved me oh so much
I got to come straight here.
I feel so lucky to have a Mom
who had so much love for me
I learned my lesson very quick
My Mommy set me free.
I miss my Mommy oh so much
but I visit her each day.
When she goes to sleep
on her pillow's where I lay.
I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek
and whisper in her ear,
Mommy don't be sad today
I'm your baby and I'm here.
"So you see my dear sweet one,
your children are OK.
Your babies are here in my home
and this is where they'll stay.
They'll wait for you with me
until your lesson is through.
And on that day that you come home
they'll be at the gates for you.
So now you see what makes a Mother.
It's the feeling in your heart.
It's the love you had so much of
right from the very start.
praying for you family, and so sorry for what you are going through...
Words can not express my sorrow for you both at this time. I am just heartbroken to imagine your sadness, and I will pray for you both to find peace, and comfort through your faith.
I will also pray for your beautiful daughters, who most surely are in heaven, being well cared for until you meet them again.
Most sincerely,
Leslie Johnson
There are no words. It just sucks. Period. I'm here from Kayleigh's blog as well and my thoughts and prayers are with you. Karen
Dear Rachel, am praying for you and I am so sorry for your loss of Hannah, am thinking of you and sending you all my prayers and wishes during this difficult time, may Hannah rest in peace with her big sister in heaven.
With kind regards
Mum of another angel (Harry)
Louisa Line
(Melbourne, Australia)
I am so sorry that you are having to go through this again. I am praying for you that God will give you strength. Just let me know if there is anything I can do. My heart goes out to you and Ryan. I know it probably won't help but I just know in my heart that Carly, Hannah, andPeyton are playing together in heaven just waiting for us.
Sincerely,
Peyton's mom
Mindy
Ryan & Rachel:
No words can be said to take your pain away at this time. Just know that you are in the prayers of so many people and we wish that, with time, God will make your pain easier to bear. Praying for you and your angels...
Another Kayleigh follower,
Keri in New Hampshire
On behalf of the Fricker family and the Preemie forum we send our condolences to you in this time of need. Our hearts break for you as we praying and weep with your family. May Carly embrace her sweet sister and may they forever be laughing and running among the clouds.
NeeNee1971
My thoughts and prayers are w/ you during this very difficult time.I am so sorry for your loss, no words can comfort you after all you've been through but we are hear for you and thinking of you and praying for you!
Sha'ree
sljellis1613
preemiegroup
Oh Rachel...I am so sorry to hear about your loss...my heart is breaking for you.
Please let us know if theres anything we can do for you.
in our thoughts and prayers.
Kimberley aka countrygal from the preemie parent support group
http://z6.invisionfree.com/preemie_group/index.php?act=idx
You don't know me and I don't know you, but I have felt the pain of losing a child. My firstborn, my perfect daughter Madeline, was stillborn at 41 weeks. I have just learned of the loss of your sweet children through Carly Dudley, and I wanted you to know that I am thinking of your family. My heart is breaking for you. I know there are no words that can fix what has been shattered for you, so I won't try. Please know I am here if you ever need to talk. You can contact me at mjc157@yahoo.com or through beautyinthebreakdownart.blogspot.com.
I am wishing you moments of peace and comfort in these dark days.
with much love,
Stephanie
My thoughts and prayers are with you. If you ever need someone to lean on. I am here. Please know that there are so many out there that wish to support you.
Liz
www.asmallvictory.org
www.janellvictory.com
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